So if a Chicago winter is like being punched in the face, then a Chicago summer is like being pinched in the ass. Just last night as I waited for the train, shivering in my winter hat and scarf, Chicago was definitely punching me in the face. This Memorial Day, weather forecasters are predicting some definite ass-pinching weather–with highs in the mid 90’s. So Chicago, does that mean you’re only going to spoon with me for two days? Two days? You didn’t even buy me dinner. I hope you’ll be gentle with me this summer. And give me flowers. Lots and lots of flowers.